Why Hello There!

Welcome to my very first blog post! I decided to start this blog to help myself keep track of my daily thoughts, activities, and probable struggles in trying to move my life in a much more happy direction.

Me at over 200 lbs in 2007

I've spent a lot of my life in a really negative place and subsequently wasted a lot of my life hating myself. The last few years have included a lot of positive change, but I am still not 100% happy with my life. I've always struggled with my weight, and while I am not as heavy as I used to be (midway through college I weighed well over 200 lbs!!) it is still a really big sticking point for me. I think my weight has been a huge impediment for me in trying to develop a healthy sense of myself. I've found that it is very difficult to love someone who can't love themselves; this has had some very obvious consequences for me in relationships, romantic and otherwise.

Attempts at redirecting my life in the last few years have had both ups and downs. I'm hoping this blog will help motivate myself in taking baby steps towards a better "Jenny". I think it is helpful to go back and ready about your triumphs and struggles when you might be stalling in your efforts to do whatever it is you are trying to do for yourself. I'm also hoping to maybe create a support network for myself: people who are working towards the same things I am, friends I already have who care about my sense of self, and anyone else who might find themselves caring :)

My "vintage" Motobecane

When I was in college at the University of Wisconsin, I would ride my bike everywhere. When I moved to Milwaukee, I thought my cycling days were over because I didn't think Milwaukee was a biking friendly town. However, this winter I was visiting my parents at their house in Little Chute when I found my bike in the garage. When my eyes fell on that two wheeled beauty, I fell in love all over again. Now, when I say beauty I mean that very much in the sense that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. My bike is actually my mom's old bike that she bought back in the 70's at a bike shop on the south side of St. Louis. My dad had the frame rebuilt for me a few years back, but it's still not the nicest bike in the world. I still love it. A few weeks ago the urge hit. My summer job ended, the time was ripe. I took my Motobecane into the bike shop, got some new tires put on (that was quite the ordeal!), and rekindled my love affair with cycling.

My first ride back out there was 18.6 miles and it felt...amazing. I mean, I hurt like a B, but it was still so exhilarating. A few days ago I put in a 35 mile ride and the following day a 30 mile ride. The fact that I was capable of cycling what seems like such long distances and the advent of Google Maps bike directions put a crazy but exciting idea in my head: epic bike trip. I decided that I am going to ride my bike to Elgin, Illinois next weekend to visit friends. Their house is 82.3 miles away. I'm scared...but in an excited way! My mom is just scared. Haha! This week will be a training week. First thing to take care of: purchasing some cycling shorts. Why? My butt will really appreciate the padding that is an integral component of cycling shorts.

I'm incredibly excited to spend my last week of summer vacation bicycling around beautiful Milwaukee! Once I return from Elgin, curriculum work and the girls' tennis season begins, effectively cutting my summer vacation short about a month. Oh well, the life of a teacher!

Cheers, Jenny!